Yet Another Worst Cybersex Line Ever

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: asl
You: hello
Stranger: hi
You: I am 19/f/london
You: you?
Stranger: 20/m/ ney york
Stranger: wanna trade pics?
You: no, not really
You: wanna cyber?
Stranger: do i get pics after?
You: depends how good you are ;p
Stranger: we can trade :0
Stranger:
You: so
Stranger: pics first, then cyber
Stranger: i like seeing my girl first
You: but I’m afraid you won’t like me
You: I’ma bit chubby
Stranger: you wont like me either
Stranger: so am i
You: and my penis is too large
You have disconnected.

Let’s kill some virgins!

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: “asl” is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: Let’s kill some virgins!
Stranger: Woot?Woot@
Stranger: !*
You: Woot indeed!
You: Nobody is safe!
You: Apart from sluts
Stranger: Lets kill the elves that steal our lefts socks!!!
You: and the dwarves that steal the socks from our right feet!
Stranger: OH MY GOD!!!
Stranger: NO WAY?!?!
You: yes way!
Stranger: We also need to kill those dirty hoes from underneath my house.. Oh wait that’s your mom..
Stranger: My bad.
You: an understandable mistake to make
Stranger: Haha. Your funny.
You: As are you, let us go on murderous, yet hilarious, rampages
Stranger: Oh Baby! Lets go! Is there sex involved?
You: Depends on your views towards necrophilia I suppose
You: you can’t have sex before they die though, otherwise they wouldn’t be virgins!
Stranger: OH shit!
Stranger: What about pancakes).o
Stranger: 0.o*
You: Well I suppose you can have sex with them if you want
Stranger: Yay!
Stranger: Do you really have sex with corspses?
You: No
You: Not yet
You: but who else will we sex with once everybody else is dead?
Stranger: Not sure.
You: Get your guns
You: I’ll bring the landmines
Stranger: *click* I got mine.
You: excellent
Stranger: Yo mamma is so tall, she did a backflip and kicked Jesus!
You: She did
You: How did you know?
Stranger: I saw it happen. I was having a quicky with Jesus.
You: he is a massive whore
Stranger: I know!
Stranger: I dont got anymore.
You: you make me sad
Stranger: Sorry.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Only YOU can Prevent the Forest Fires in my Pants

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: only you can prevent forest fires
You: IN MY PANTS!!!
Stranger: thats quite a responsibilty
You: it is
You: millions of people die each year due to uncontrolled wildfires in my underwear
Stranger: ill take option c please, carol
You: it’s a terrible crime
You: carol cannot hear you, for she is in my pants, attempting to stop forest fires
You: but she needs your help!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The Worst Thing to Say During Cybersex Ever

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Are you a horny girl with a cam?
You: yes!
Stranger:
Stranger: age from
You: are you a horny girl too? I’m a bisexual but I kinda feel like watching a girl today
Stranger: im male
You: oh
You: uhh I guess that’s ok
You: how old are you?
Stranger: u f?
Stranger: im 21
Stranger: u
You: yeah I’m a girl
Stranger: age?
You: I’m 38
You: is that ok?
Stranger: ok;)
Stranger: nice
You: it’ll be like watching your mom!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

An Explosion of Frenchness

Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: bouillabaisse
Stranger: rattatouille!
You: clam chowder!
Stranger: entrecote!
You: gateux!
Stranger: au chocolat!
You: escalopes!
Stranger: mon amour!
You: ma petit chou!
Stranger: a dieu!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.